Eating?
by keitaya
Summary: Meal time around Ron is never fun. Why hasnt anyone done anything about it? Lets see what happens now...  This will be a H/H story in the end.
1. Chapter 1

Eating?...

By Keitaya

I dont own so please dont sue.

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"Professor I want to make a formal complaint"

"Against who?"

"Ron Weasley"

"Ron Weas... Why?"

"Besides his poor hygine, I mean the guy stinks and doesnt even care! Or his blatent biggotry, (have you listened to him recently? He is worse than Draco Malfoy.) Or his bullying other students if they go anywhere near Harry Potter? Ron pushed me down the stairs for dareing to ask Harry if I could borrow a quill in class! There is more but the biggest complaint I have is any time he eats."

"What is the problem? We all need to eat"

"If you can call what Ron does eating.. If you are anywhere near him at a meal then you better count your fingers after. One of the first years had to have one regrown after Ron bit it off and the prat didnt even notice!"

Turning green "I see... "

"And thats not to mention that he talks with his mouth so stuffed with food that anyone in a 10 foot raidus gets covered when he talks.. I also know that several people who want to loose weight sit near him just to stop themselves even feeling hungry."

"I can see a pattern here.."

"But that isnt all of it Profesor. If you dare to try and serve yourself from any plate near him he snatches whatever he wants off your plate! No-one wants to be anywhere near him at meals, including his brothers and sister. They eat like civilised people, whats wrong with Ron? There is actualy a race on at meal times now. We all watch to see where Ron sits and the winners are those who can sit the furthest away from him."

"I see. Thank you for bringing this to my attention. I will do whatver I can to remidy this situation."

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I read this as a chalange that I cant find anymore so I am doing it my own way. If anyone knows the chalange please let me know. Thanks.


	2. Chapter 2

After hearing the complaint the teachers started watching the youngest Weasley male closely.

At meals there was a teacher sitting at the Gryffindor table taking notes. When Ron was in the halls or around the grounds there was always a member of staff nearby.

At dinner one night things started to change.

A new table appeared set for one person at the front of the hall.

As the students started to arrive for the meal Professor McGonagall stood and addressed the students.

"Would Ronald Weasley please come forward."

Ron did with Harry and Hermione standing nearby.

"Mr. Weasley, due to a complaint made to a member of the staff by a classmate of yours, and an investigation made by the teaching staff, the following decisions have been made. Owing to your gross lack of table manners you are to sit separate to the rest of your house. You will be provided with an appropriate meal for someone of your age and activity levels. You will not be provided with more than that to help you to control your greed that we have noticed you suffer from. You have been eating in one sitting more than any 2 or 3 other students eat in a day! As such we will be contacting your parents asking them to reimburse the school for the excessive amounts of food you have consumed since your first year. If your parents cannot or will not pay this amount then there will be no choice but to suspend you until the money is paid. If it is not received by the start of the next school year then you will be expelled, have your wand snapped and your magic bound."

"You can't do this!" Ron yelled, turning red.

"Be quiet please. I think you will find what I can and have done Mr. Weasley is well within my powers to do. Now please go to your table quietly."

Grumbling to himself Ron stomped to the table. He then turned and called out

"Hey Harry Hermione we get a table to ourselves. C'mon hurry up and sit down. I'm starved."

"Err...Ron? That table is just for you. We aren't allowed to sit there, right Professor?"

"That is correct Mr. Potter. This table is only brought out in extreme cases like this and only one person may sit it."

"Oh, I think I read about it in 'Hogwarts, a History'. It was named the Pigs table and it hasn't been used in at nearly three hundred years. It is only brought out as a last resort to try and encourage students to modify their behavior at meals."

"Correct Miss Granger. 20 points to Gryffindor for your extremely esoteric knowledge of Hogwarts. Now please go to your table with your classmates and we can all have our dinners."

Five minutes later Ron had finished his meal and stood up.

"Where are you going Mr. Weasley?" Asked Professor Dumbledore

"I need more food. I'm still hungry"

"Now now Mr. Weasley. It was explained to you what was going to happen. You have eaten your meal and you are not getting any more."

"WHAT! You mean that's IT! ONE measly little plate is all I can have! I need more to keep me going than this!" Ron screamed.

And with that Ron dove toward the nearest table and reached for the food there. Several red spells hit Ron and knocked him unconscious.

"This is even worse than we feared" commented Professor Dumbledore as Ron was levitated out of the hall.

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Ron was taken to Professor McGonagall's office and revived. As soon as he awoke he started yelling at the teachers.

"What did you do that for? Huh! I need more food and you pricks stop me from eating? Why'd you do that? You lousy bunch of…"

With that he was silenced.

Professor McGonagall was angry and snapped "You seem to be under the misapprehension that you can behave like you have been with no consequences. I hate to tell you this, Mr. Weasley, but you are in big trouble even before your little performance here. Hmm, to start things off, thirty points from Gryffindor for yelling at a teacher. Now," she took a deep breath and continued. "What I wanted to talk to you about is a bit more delicate and I thought that you might not want to have this conversation in front of the whole school."

Ron looked like he was trying to say something but the silencing spell worked well and he was quiet, but very red in the face.

"To begin Mr. Weasley, I, as your head of house, have been approached by many people, and a few sentient creatures, regarding your personal hygiene. The merfolk have threatened to leave the lake if you went in it again. The giant squid was covered in a rash for almost a month after that swim. And yes we can prove it was you. The amount of gas you pass has left the boys that share your dorm with many illnesses and the room itself needs regular fumigation just to make it passably livable. That is not even starting on the people you offend just by walking past them. Have you ever noticed that no one stands downwind of you if they can help it? With Madam Pomphreys help we may be able to work on that.

"Next, there is your posesivness of Harry Potter. Yes, I have noticed. Every time he trys to talk to anyone other than yourself or Miss Granger you imediatly attempt to regain his attention. Even when Mr Potter is doing his homework you cannot seem to leave him alone. I dont know if it is matter of your affections getting the better of you or if you honestly believe that Mr Potter must follow what you say whenever you say something and be the center of his attention. You even try to alienate Miss Granger unless you need her help with your homework. Bullying other students because they may talk to Mr Potter or anyone else is NOT acceptable in any way, shape or form. This is another thing that MUST improve if you wish to continue here at Hogwarts.

The professor stopped there and took a deep berath, letting it and her agrivation out slowly. She looked at the silent, red faced student and asked quietly,

"Now do you have anything to say? No? Then you may go back to your dorm and I hope to see a marked improvement very soon. Oh, and last thing, Finite incantatum.

With that the door was shut in Ron's face.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Thanks to all those wonderful reviewers. Some of your questions will be answered here. The rest? You will have to wait and see.

I still don't own anything so please, do yourself a favour and don't sue. You won't get anything.

Harry and Hermione watched the scene unfolding before them with growing dread.

"Who do you think reported Ron for this?" asked Harry.

"I don't know, but it could be just about anyone in the school." replied Hermione.

Lavender leaned over the table and said in a quiet voice "It was me"

"Why?" asked Hermione.

"I am sick of being sickened at meals. Most people don't know this but I have an illness that means I NEED to eat at regular times and similar amounts each meal. Ron's behaviour was making it hard for me to get better."

"Oh, I am so sorry, I didn't know! Is there anything we can do to help?"

Giggling, Lavender replied "No but thanks for asking. I have only told Madam Pomphrey, Professor McGonagall and Parvarti. Who knew a gossip like me could keep a secret like this."

"Well if you ever need help then let us know and we will do what we can." offered Harry. "Hey, Nev, do you think that they might do something about the gas levels in the dorms?"

"Who knows? Hey, what about his snoring? Think they can fix that? It would be nice not to sleep in a noise factory for a change."

Everyone laughed at that. Ron's snoring was legendary in the Gryffindor dorms. Some of the girls swore that they could hear Ron at night, even through several thick stone walls.

"Well, whatever happens, it won't be any worse than how things are now. I mean, we have had to put up with this behaviour and bad manners for three years now. But looking logically at behaviour patterns, the first years are given slack because it is their first time away from home and parental rules, second years are expected to improve and start behaving appropriately, we third years have no excuses to behave like pigs. We are supposed to know what is and isn't acceptable here. Not to mention that none of the other Weasley's behave like this. It only suggests that it is just another case of Ron being Ron. Bad tempered, rude and who has no concept of hygiene or table manners. Oh, and I almost forgot, totally and utterly socially inept!" Ranted Hermione.

"Err, Hermione? I thought that Ron was your friend." Said Seamus.

"The only reason I put up with Ron was because Harry is his friend. I didn't want to lose Harrys friendship. Why would I put myself through all the abuse Ron heaps on me otherwise?"

"Umm, actually I only put up with him because I thought you were his friend" Harry replied, blushing.

"That's it! Was anyone really Ron's friend or did we all just tolerate him for other peoples sakes?" demanded Hermione.

All the Gryffindor's looked at each other in silence. All of them realized that they did not like one Ronald Billius Weasley, and would no longer put up with him bringing their house into disrepute.

Later that night.

"Who does she think she is? Wanting to expel me just cos I'm a growing boy!" Ron thought to himself as he stormed through the common room and up to his dorm. "I need something to eat"

He looked through his trunk and found nothing. "Maybe Harry has something. I know he saves food. And the old bint calls me greedy." Ron looked through Harry's trunk and found nothing. "Let's see if the other boys have anything. Seamus... nothing...Dean...old moldy cheese sandwich...Nev…"

"What do you think you are doing Ron? Why are you in my trunk?" yelled Neville.

"Um..I...err.." stammered Ron.

Neville walked to the door and called down to the common room .

"I need a prefect up here right now, and someone go get Professor McGonagall."

"What's going on now Longbottom? Some of us are trying to study" demanded the head boy, Percy Weasley.

"Why don't you ask your brother why he was going through my trunk. It looks like he went through everyone's in here."

"Ron?"

"Um...I forgot which trunk was mine?" Ron said in a small voice, looking at the floor.

"After 3 years I don't think that would be true. Ahh, Professor McGonagall, I am glad your here."

"What's going on Mr. Weasley?" Ron and Percy started speaking at the same time.

"Well...Ron...trunk...nothing...wrong..."

"Alright, Percy, as head boy, please tell me what happened"

"I don't know Professor. Neville called for a prefect and then when I came up here he accused Ron of being in his trunk"

"I see and what did Ronald have to say about it?"

"That he forgot which trunk was his."

"I see. Thank you for your prompt response Percy. You may go back to your studies now."

Sighing Professor McGonagall looked at the two boys. "Mr. Longbottom, please explain what happened."

"I came up to get a book and found all the trunks open, our things were scattered around and Ron was leaning into my trunk. That's why I called for you and a prefect."

"I see. Mr. Weasley. What do you have to say for yourself?"

"Umm…I forgot which one was my trunk?"

"Hmm… are you telling me that you couldn't see that your name was written on the top of your trunk? Or that it is in the same place that it has been for the last three years?"

When Ron said nothing and continued to stare at the floor she sighed again.

"This cannot go on Mr. Weasley. I am going to have to report this to your parents. I don't think even your twin brothers ever had two letters sent home in less than one hour. Keep up this behavior and suspension will not be an option anymore. Good night boys."


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

For reference, 1 galleon = 100 pounds.

Don't own, don't sue. You would only get a caravan with a leaky roof!

Later that night a tired owl arrived at its destination.

Sitting at the kitchen table Arthur Weasley took the offered letter with a sense of dread. It was never a good thing to get a letter from your children's school so late in the day.

"What have the twins done now" he sighed.

Opening the letter he could only stare in shock at the letter and itemized invoice that came with it.

"What is it dear" asked his wife Molly. "Have the twins blown up the common room this time? Or did they slip Professor Snape another potion? Really that one to make his clothes invisible was going too far! Those poor children must have been so traumatized by the sight of Severus walking around looking naked. But I doubt that they listened to anythin…"

Arthur thrust the parchments into Molly's hands and simply said "Read it".

"Oh my! 'Dear Mr. and Mrs. Weasley. I am writing to inform you of the probation of your youngest son Ronald. Owing to his complete lack of table manners, a failure to curb his greed with food, an inability to grasp the necessity for even the most basic hygiene and an unfortunate lack of manners in any way conceivable, it has been decided by the staff that Ronald is to be placed on probation here at Hogwarts. This decision was made after a thorough investigation, conducted by the senior staff members and the headmaster, which has uncovered the following points along with many others.

In the course of one meal Ronald would consume the same amount of food as any 3 or 4 of his year mates. Much of this food was wasted as Ronald sprayed it over fellow students as he talked with his mouth overly stuffed.

Ronald shows a violent possessiveness of Mr. Harry Potter, both Mr. Potter's attention and physical being.

During dinner Ronald was observed taking food from the plates of other students. Once taking food of a student's fork as the student was raising it to their mouth.

Ronald is only passing his classes thanks to the excessive amounts of help from Miss Hermione Granger. Without her help Ronald would not have completed any of the written work. Unfortunately, his practical work is also below what is expected at this stage of his education.

Ronald shows no care for his personal hygiene at all. He has gone for several days in the same clothes and often has smudges of food or dirt on his skin and clothing in various places. It is apparent that he had not bathed for several days.

Ronald was seen physically striking and verbally berating a first year student for talking to Harry Potter. (side note: The student – female- was asking directions to the library)

In regard to the excessive amounts of food, we have to request that an additional fee be paid as the amount set in the regular school fees will not cover even one quarter of the expense that the school has incurred feeding Ronald. If this amount (please see attached invoice) is not received by the end of this coming term then Ronald will be suspended until such time as the money is paid. If no payment has been made by the start of the next school year, unfortunately Ronald will be expelled, with all penalties that then may occur.

For the moment Ronald has been seated at a separate table in the Great Hall at meal times. This table is known as the "Pig Table". It is where a person with little knowledge of manners and appropriate conduct at meals would sit, isolated from the other students, until such time as the person shows a working knowledge of conduct becoming of a Hogwarts student. This table has not been needed in over three hundred years. At this table Ronald will be given a meal appropriate for his age and levels of activity. He is banned from seeking food from other sources. During his first meal Ronald became violent and aggressive when reminded that he was only getting one serve of food. Unfortunately, several staff members had to stun Ronald to protect our other students.

At this time we are uncertain where the possessiveness of Mr. Potter comes from. It may be either an infatuation or something far more troubling. Only time and Ronald will be able to tell us which. However, this cannot continue as it is. While friendship is encouraged, Ronald's interference is causing Mr. Potter's marks and social outlets to be curtailed. This is something that I am hoping that, as Ronald's parents, you may be able to assist to discover the source of.

As to Ronald's hygiene matters. Madam Pomphrey and I have discusses the matter and we will be discussing the matter further with Ronald tomorrow morning. We are hoping to see a fast improvement.

I am hoping that this matter can be resolved in a timely manner to the satisfaction of all concerned.

Yours truly,

M. McGonagall.

Deputy Headmistress, Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry

Head of Gryffindor House' "  
>"Now look at this invoice!" Arthur told Molly in a very controlled voice.<p>

"….Se…se…" stuttered Molly.

"That's seven Hundred Galleons! Do you know how much that is? That is over two years pay for me! Merlin only knows that there is no way I can pay that amount!" yelled Arthur. "You were warned about Ron's behavior. You saw it every day and did nothing about it. When I tried to help the boy, YOU thought you knew better and overruled me! When he refused to take a shower for nearly a month last summer you ignored it until I hexed him clean and then I was the one you screeched at! No more Molly! I have let you run things for far too long. Ronald will be coming home at christmas and I pray that we can work out a payment plan for this of otherwise it will be on your head that we have a squib for a son at best."

Arthur drew a breath to continue but was interrupted by the arrival of another owl.

Taking the new letter Arthur let out a groan. "For the love of Merlin! 'Dear Mr. and Mrs. Weasley, I regret to inform you that your son, Ronald, was found pilfering the trunks of his dorm mates. Ronald claims that he had forgotten which trunk was his own. Unfortunately the evidence suggests otherwise. Owing to this he will be in supervised detention for two weeks and all Hogsmeade privileges will be suspended until after the christmas break.

I would like to ask if a meeting could be arranged at your earliest convenience to discuss Ronald's continuance at this school.

Yours truly,

M. McGonagall.

Deputy Headmistress, Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry

Head of Gryffindor House' "

Taking several deep breaths, the normally placid man was shaking with anger. In a controlled manner he turned to his wife.

"Molly, not even the twins have had us called for a meeting at the school. This may be worse than anything that you could imagine. If Ron is booted from school then we lose him. You know what will happen. He will be a Muggle. And there is nothing you or I can do to stop it."

"But..."

"But nothing, Molly! You know the laws as well as I do. And Merlin help you if this does happen. I will arrange the meeting in the morning. You will come with me and keep your mouth shut! You caused a large part of this and I will be seeing you get your fair share of the blame."


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Still don't own any characters or the Harry Potter universe. Darn it!

Thank you all for your reviews. They are great encouragement for me.

A GIANT thank you to my daughter who influenced my choices of Ron's medical problems and punishments, oops I ment treatments.

The next morning no one would even look in Ron's direction. When he tried to talk to anyone they just ignored him or moved away. Not even Percy would spare a glance at him.

"Prat's" he thought.

As he sat down to his (to him) meager breakfast an owl winged its way to him holding a familiar red envelope.

"Great, that's all I need now. Mum yelling at me." He thought gloomily.

However, instead of his mother's voice (that he could tune out and ignore while he concentrated on more important things- like eating) his father's voice boomed across the hall, startling all five Weasley children.

"RONALD WEASLEY! I HAVE NEVER BEEN ASHAMED OF ANY OF MY CHILDREN UNTILL NOW! YOU EITHER START BEHAVING LIKE A HUMAN BEING OR I WILL BRING YOU HOME AND HAVE AUNT MURIEL TUTOR YOU. THIS IS YOUR ONLY WARNING. DON'T WASTE IT."

With that the whole hall was shocked into silence.

"Ouch! Aunt Muriel? Low blow Dad" murmured Fred.

"I don't think I ever heard Dad yell like that" commented Ginny.

"Dad rarely raises his voice, but, as you heard, he can do it if he needs to" said George.

Ron sat at his table in shock. Dad… yelling at me? It had never happened before. Ron's world was turning upside down.

As he finished his breakfast Professor McGonagall spoke.

"Mr Ronald Weasley is to report to the infirmary. He is excused from classes until lunch time. Everyone else off you go."

"Great." Thought Ron. "The old bat had to embarrass me with everyone watching. But at least I get out of charms with the snakes and history."

As Ron made his solitary way to the infirmary, Harry was sitting in the charms classroom, chatting with his class mates.

"Well, we all know what happened in the dorms last night. The question is, what are we going to do about it? I know that the professors are following their procedures, but I think a few of us need to show what we think of all this." Said Harry

"Well I was thinki" Hermione started to say.

"Hey Potter." Called Draco.

"What do you want Malfoy?"

"Glad to see the Weasel get what he deserves. It IS about time someone did something about him."

"What do you know about it?"

"Besides the show in the hall last night, rumour has it that he was stealing from you all last night. I was going to offer you a charm to keep intruders out of your things. But if you are going to be like that I will keep it."

"Why? You never do something for nothing. What do you want?"

"Have you ever wondered why I don't like that red haired walking food disposal? When I was a kid my mother invited all the pureblood children my age to my seventh birthday party. That is an important birthday in the magical world. HE came with his mother and ruined the whole day for me. He demolished my cake, broke my new broom, scared my kneezle away and after he left I found that one of my new toys was stolen. Mr Weasley returned it with his apologies the next day, but it wasn't the same. That's why I don't like him."

"Err… sorry Malfoy. I didn't know."

"Whatever. But my father taught me a charm that keeps people from taking your stuff. It also paints the person green to show what they were trying to do. They don't turn back to normal until the person confesses to the owner of what they were trying to steal. Only the owner can cancel the charm on them. Do you want it or not?"

"Mr Malfoy, that sounds like a charm that should be shared with the class. Please come up here and demonstrate it." Remarked Professor Flitwick.

"Yes Professor. On the condition that everyone swears that they will never tell Weasley about it."

"That sounds fair to me. Let's get started then"

In the infirmary Ron was not having a good day.

"To begin, please get changed into this gown and then sit on the bed. Call me when you are ready." ordered Madam Pomphrey.

A few minutes later Ron said he was ready.

"Alright. First we are going to do a full physical exam. Then we will see what has to happen…hmm… you are thirteen aren't you?"

"Yeah, so what?"

"Your cholesterol levels are what I would expect for an eighty year old Muggle! Your gallbladder is so distended that I am surprised you are not writhing in pain on the floor. Your liver is about to start shutting down and so are your kidneys. Do you drink alcohol at all? No? Because it seems like you are on the verge of cirrhosis, a nasty condition, that one. You also have several parasitic infestations. Most of this can be fixed but you will have to follow a strict diet and take many potions each day. Do you think you can do that? Because if you can't, you will be dead before you are sixteen. I am also seeing the beginnings of a rather nasty skin infection."

"But I feel fine. I'm not going on any stupid girly diet. And you can forget any of your bloody potions. They all taste like s…gurgle"

Madam Pomphrey lost her patience and cast a soap suds spell at Ron's mouth.

"Now IF you can talk like a rational person I will stop."

Ron nodded frantically.

"Very well then." She said cancelling the spell.

Madam Pomphrey started handing Ron vials of potions as she talked.

"Now, let us continue. First you need an anti-gas potion to help stop the flatulence. Heaven knows that the boys you dorm with will be glad for this one. Now an anti-parasitic. You will need the toilet soon so off you go."

One hour and one very sore bottom later.

"Well, now that that is done we can continue. This one is to kick start your liver and kidneys, and do not pull those faces at me young man. I didn't do this to you so stop complaining. At lunch today you will be starting your low fat, low sugar and low salt diet to start helping the potions to work. Tomorrow we will start you on a potion to help your gallbladder and the day after for your cholesterol. You will also come here before each meal and before curfew to get your anti- gas potion. If I have to come looking for you then you will think that Professor Snape is the kindest person you could know compared to me! After we finish talking you will go and shower, wash yourself with this special soap and come out here so I can help you put the cream on the infection. You will be doing this three times each day. Now, are there any questions?"

"Don't I get a say in any of this?"

A new voice came from the doorway.

"No you don't" said Arthur Weasley. "I have told the school that any treatment that they feel is needed will be done whether you like it or not."

"But Dad…"

"But nothing Ron. It is do this or go home. You can chose if you really want to but I will warn you now. At home you will be tutored by your Aunt Muriel. You will be expected to do your chores in addition to your school work and your mother will not be coddling you anymore. It is time to grow up a bit son. Let me know what your choice will be. Once you make it there will be no turning back."


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Don't own anything. Anything you recognise ain't mine!

Please remember that Harry, Hermione and Ron are 13 in this story and will act their ages.

I want to say that there is no structure to my updates. I do it when the chapter is ready. However, this one is a birthday present to myself! 

Walking to classes without Ron was a novelty for Harry and Hermione. They could talk about what they were interested in and not have to stop to explain any muggle things. How refreshing.

Reaching the history room they continued their discussion even when Professor Binns started his monotone lecture. The ghostly Professor never noticed the chatter.

"What do you think they are going to do to Ron?" asked Hermione.

"Dunno, they don't have any electricity so the electro probes are out." Grinned Harry

"Harry, that's just…that's…" and Hermione broke into giggles. "You, sir, have been watching too many bad horror movies!"

"Is there such a thing as a 'good' horror movie?" Replied Harry cheekily.

"What's a 'orror mevee'?" asked a soft voice behind them. They turned and saw Morag MacDougal leaning towards them curiously. "I never heard of such a thing."

"It's Horror Movie. It is…umm, it's like a long play that scares you that you watch on a screen instead of a stage that you can watch at home. Some of them can be a bit silly." Replied Hermione.

"Oh, err ok then. Sorry." Morag said shrinking back.

"Why are you sorry? You only asked a question."

"Well, you and Potter don't normally talk to anyone else Weasley starts his guard dog bit."

"Look. I am sorry but you are right. Ron has been keeping people away from us and we never noticed. Harry? How many people do you know from other houses?" Hermione quietly asked.

"I talked a bit to Hannah in Hufflepuff sometimes, and Susan too. Err, I don't think I really talk with anyone else… damn it!" Harry spat frowning.

"Language! What's wrong?"

"No wonder people were so ready to believe the rumours about me Hermione. They don't know me. They only know what they have read. You know, The Boy Who, for all I know, threw a dirty nappy at Moldy Snorts. So how can I blame them for not believing me? Even in Gryffindor. I only really talk to about four or five people. Ron kept turning our, no, MY attention onto him and what he was doing." Harry realised.

"Well, now that you know that, what are you going to do about it?" asked Morag.

Harry grinned. He turned to Morag and held out his hand. "Hi, I'm Harry Potter. You can call my Harry."

Giggling Morag shook his hand and replied "Pleasure to meet you, I'm Morag MacDougal."

Harry saw that the whole class was watching him now. So Harry stood up and shook hands with everyone in the class (except Professor Binns).

Laughing, the class started chatting amongst themselves and ignored the droning ghost lecturing.

"Hermione?"

"Yes Harry?"

"Next weekend is a Hogsmeade weekend isn't it?"

"Yes, why? Did you want me to get you something when I'm there?"

"Um… no…I just…never mind." Stuttered Harry.

"No, what did you want to ask?" asked a curious Hermione. Harry was never this nervous.

Clearly steeling himself he asked "Would you like to go on a picnic or something with me next Saturday?"

"Umm…sure. What's the occasion?"

"Err, no reason. I just wanted to spend some time with you. You know, relaxing and stuff…"

"Oh. That sounds good then. We just need to find a place away from the Dementors. Maybe we can invite a few others to come too! Perhaps Neville or Ginny or maybe Fr…"

"NO!" he shouted. Turning red he tried again. "No, I meant just you and me. Kinda like a…look never mind. Bad idea. Forget I said anything."

Puzzled Hermione asked "Like a what?...Did you mean…like a date?"

Flushing Harry said "I said never mind. I don't know why you would ever say yes anyway."

Reaching over and taking his hand Hermione said "Harry, look at me please. I would be honoured to go on a picnic date with you."

Smiling broadly Harry asked "Do you mean that? You're not saying that just to make me feel better are you? "

"Nope" Hermione said, popping the p. "I don't do sympathy dates. So, was there anything else you might want to say Mr Potter?"

Turning rad again Harry stammered "I…I…I thi…ithinkilikeyoualot." And promptly hid his face in his hands.

"What?"

Running what Harry had said over in her mind Hermione could not work out why Harry was upset. Morag leaned over the desk and whispered to Hermione.

"I think he said that he likes you. You know. As in more than friends."

"Oh, is that…OH!" turning back to Harry she gently pulled his hands down and said "I think I like you, more than just friends too."

"Really?"

"Really really."

"Well, um, I guess I should ask you, er, wouldyoubemygirlfriend?" the last came out in a rush.

Beginning to understand nervous male talk Hermione took a guess and said "I would love to be your girlfriend!"

A number of students watching them smiled and gave small cheers.

"That's…umm…. That's great! Oh, I just thought of something."

"Ron?"

"Yup. If he was bad before how is he going to be about us together?"

"Well, he can like it, or he can lump it! And I can give him the lumps if I need to, too." Smirked Hermione.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

Don't own anything. There is nothing to gain by suing.

A long chapter (well for me and my writing)

Big thanks to my Smeghead for her help and ideas. 

Arthur Weasley knew he was going to have a bad day. After having two owls arrive within minutes of each other the previous night both concerning his youngest son, Arthur knew that something bad was going to happen today.

It started with Molly continually muttering about how "Her Ronnykins" was just a growing boy and that nothing was wrong with him or his behaviour.

Molly was so distracted by her thoughts that she burnt the eggs, half cooked the bacon and confused the salt and sugar in the tea.

After swallowing a stomach soothing potion, Arthur flooed Professor McGonagall to arrange the meeting. Being told to be at the school "the sooner the better" did not improve his mood.

Arriving at the school things soon took a turn for the worse.

Seeing the Headmaster and their children's head of house Molly immediately began a verbal attack.

"How dare you tell such lies and say that my Ronny was so awful that you have to isolate my poor boy! He needs his friends around him. And what do you mean that he is greedy? He is just a growing child that …."

Her tirade was cut off with a well-placed silencing charm from her irate husband.

"I told you to be silent and if this is what it takes so be it!" Arthur thundered at her.

"Now" Arthur continued more calmly "What is happening? I think there is more than you said in your letters Professor."

Professor McGonagall began speaking. "Thank you Arthur. Yes there is more. To start at the beginning, I was approached by a classmate of Ronald's about his behaviour, naming a number of problems that the staff were unaware of. We observed his actions and behaviour for a week and were distressed and disgusted by what we saw. To begin, a total lack of table manners. He seems unable to use the cutlery provided. Not talking while food is in his mouth and other such niceties seem beyond him. We also observed your other children and only Ronald has this lack. It physically sickens those who observe it. We are dealing with a number of children in the early stages of eating disorders because of him.

"Next is Ronald's greed. He is stopping many students from getting the food at the table. He 'claims' all food near him as his personal property and students have been injured for trying to take some. One student is on a personalised diet for medical reasons and is discreetly presented with a personal plate at each meal. Because she sat near Ronald, he took her plate and slapped her when she tried to get her meal back. He took two bites of it, called it disgusting, and then covered it in other foods so no-one else could have it, even when he didn't want it.

"I have noticed that students have to change robes after sitting near Ronald at meals, often making them late for class. From my observations Ronald does not 'eat' so much as I would call it 'ravening'. The amount of wastage is unbelievable and the house elves are threatening to strike if Ronald doesn't improve. The poor things are exhausted after each meal.

"Next is Ronald's hygiene, or rather, lack of. Regular bathing seems a foreign concept to him. I have heard rumours that, in desperation, the boys of his dorm have used the 'Aguamenti' and 'Scourgify' charms on him several times this term alone to reduce the smell. And I needn't remind you of what I wrote last night about the giant squid or the Mer folk. It is troubling that no-one sits or stands near Ronald unless they absolutely have to. If they have to it is done with great reluctance. Even Mr. Potter and Miss Granger are distancing themselves.

"Next is his attitude towards others and especially Harry Potter. As I said in my letter, he seems obsessed with Mr. Potter. I have observed Ronald threatening other students to make them stay away from Mr. Potter and if the student even talks to Harry then they are often found hurt or the victim of a malicious prank. I mentioned in the letter about the first year student Ronald hit and may I also mention that the person who first made this complaint alleges that Ronald pushed them down a flight of stairs for asking to borrow a quill from Mr. Potter in class.

"I have noticed that if Mr. Potter is studying or doing something that does not include Ronald then he will interrupt and turn Mr. Potter's attention to himself. He is also trying to alienate Miss Granger, unless he needs help with his school work, his homework especially. Often he tries to get Miss Granger to do it for him. When she refuses Ronald will start an argument and disrupt the whole room with his disparaging, hurtful and rude comments made at a volume designed to embarrass and shame Miss Granger. This is, from what I understand, a regular occurrence and has had all three students banned from the library more than once.

This is rather disconcerting as he is only thirteen and is showing signs of such obsessive and violent behavior that, if allowed to continue, could become a larger problem in the future. For example, becoming verbally or physically violent towards his future spouse, or worse, becoming a stalker of the worst kind. "

Pausing to take a sip of water Professor McGonagall asked "Do you have anything you would like to add Arthur?"

Arthur looked at his still silenced wife and turning back said, "No. That is pretty much how he is at home too. Well, perhaps not to the same extremes you have been seeing. Whenever I or his brothers try to help him or correct him on his behaviour Molly steps in and makes all that we do meaningless. As he is her youngest boy she babies him badly and will not listen when we remind her that Ron, like the other boys, is growing up. I think that is a large part of the problem here."

"I see. Has Ronald displayed these obsessive tendencies before? Or given any indication that he may be homosexual?"

"Not that I am aware of. Well, other than him following the Chudley Cannons obsessively. It is sounding like he is becoming a menace to everyone. What do you think we should do?"

"Ronald is being given a full medical check-up now and we should know the results soon. If there is a medical reason for some of his behaviours then they will be treated and we should start to see an improvement. If there is not, then I suggest that you consult a mind healer. They may be able to help where we cannot." said the Headmaster. "If the problem is mental, then there is little we can do at this school. We don't have the specialists or the facilities to deal with that sort of problem."

"I see. Could we stop here and I go and see Ron? I would like to see him to get an idea of how we are going to treat him."

"Of course. He is in the hospital wing. Do you remember how to get there?"

"Yes, thank you. We still need to discuss the additional payment needed. Could we do this when I get back?"

"Certainly, Arthur." replied Dumbledore.

"Well Molly, I have a few things I would like to say to you. And since you can't talk back, you can just sit there and listen." said Professor McGonagall.

As Arthur walked he wondered how his son could be helped. Seeing Harry and Hermione walking from class he called out to them.

"Harry, Hermione can I have a word?"

"Mr Weasley, how are you? I guess you are here about Ron?" said Harry

"Yes. It is a bit of a shock to find out all this. I was wondering if I could ask you both some questions?"

"Sure, we have a free class now. Why don't we go in this room so we won't be interrupted?" Suggested Hermione.

They settled themselves in a unused classroom and Arthur began.

"As you know Ron has been having some problems lately. Can either of you tell me what's going on? Has something happened or changed to start all of this?"

"Mr Weasley, um, I really don't know how to say this, but Ron… well, he has been like this since we met but this year he has…well, he's gotten worse this year, sir. He was always a bit selfish at the table but I thought it was because he has so many older brothers to compete with at meals." Harry said nervously.

Hermione continued. "Ron has been getting worse each year. He is constantly putting me and others down because we want to do well in our courses or we don't obsess over quidditch. He has been a bit of a bully to the younger students too. Um… this is not easy to say but Ron is on the verge of having Gryffindor expel him from the house. None of the other students want to be anywhere near him because of what he has been doing."

"I see. Would you or any of the others be able to look past this and help Ron if he asked for help?"

Hermione and Harry looked at each other for several long seconds.

"I can only talk for me, sir, but if Ron is REALY trying and needing help then he can ask me. I don't know how much I would be able to do, but I will try." Harry replied softly.

"Me too. I can't speak for the others in Gryffindor, but if Ron shows he is trying I guess everyone would do a bit." Hermione said thoughtfully.

"There is just one other thing sir"

"Yes Harry, what is it"

"Err, it's about Hermione and me. You see, well, we both like each other but.."Harry shifted uncomfortably in his seat.

"But the two of you want to start dating and were worried about Ron's reaction?" Arthur smiled gently at the nervous pair. "This isn't a surprise to me. I have seen you together you know. I think you will be wonderful together. Don't worry, I will tell Ron and remind him that it is none of his beeswax!"

Harry and Hermione breathed sighs of relief. That was the last obstacle they needed to overcome for now.

Walking into the hospital wing Arthur heard his youngest son whining.

"Don't I get a say in any of this?"

"No, you don't" said Arthur, feeling that it was time to lay down the law. "I have told the school that any treatment that they feel is needed will be done whether you like it or not."

"But Dad…"

"But nothing Ron. It is do this or go home. You can chose if you really want to but I will warn you now. At home you will be tutored by your Aunt Muriel. Your mother is busy running our small orchard and the house and I work five days a week so you will be expected to do your chores in addition to your school work and help your mother when she asks you. And your mother will not be coddling you anymore. It is time to grow up a bit son. Let me know what your choice will be. Remember, once you make it there will be no turning back. Now, do you want to make your choice now or would you like a day or two to think on it?"

"I guess I'll think on it" sulked Ron.

"Good. I will be back here on the weekend and talk to you then. Just do your best, do as you are told and try to stay out of trouble, please." Arthur got up and went back to the Headmaster's office to see if there was any way of keeping his son in school. Merlin help them all, it was all up to Ron now! 


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

Not mine. If it was Harry would never have fallen for someone who looks like his MUM!

Some people blame muses for these stories. I blame the full length colour movies that run in my head won't stop until they are written out! And thanks to Slytherin66. You know what you did!

BIG thanks to Broomstick flyer for the original chalange that gave the inspiration for this story.

Walking from the hospital wing to lunch in the great hall Ron started to think for the first time about what he wanted in life. Did he want to be hated and repulsing everyone? Or would he want to do something, like his brothers have? No, not like his brothers. BETTER than them! He wanted to be the best at something. But what? What was he good at? Playing chess? Don't make money off that. Quidditch? He wasn't even on the house team. What else was there? Ron's brain was going into overdrive.

Walking into the hall he didn't notice the excited buzz going through most of the students. He ignored everyone until he sat at his table. Looking around Ron noticed that nearly everyone was focused on two young third years. What was going on? He walked over and saw that the focus was on Harry and Hermione. Great. More attention for the golden boy. Oh well. At least some of it came to him too, just by being Harry's best friend.

Then Ron noticed Harry's hand was holding Hermione's! Why? She wasn't hurt that Ron could see. And both of them are smiling. Something has happened and he, Ron, should have been there to share the … whatever it was. It can all wait until after food. Nothing's that important.

In classes Hermione and Harry sat together, they were holding hands as much as they could.

After classes finished for the day Ron caught up to them.

"Hey Harry. You want to play chess? Or exploding snap?" Ron excitedly asked.

"No thanks Ron. I want to get my homework done and then I was invited to the Hufflepuff's gobstones championships. Maybe another time."

"Oh, can I come too? I mean, if they invite you then they know that I am your best friend and you don't go anywhere without me! Budge over Herms. This is time for man talk." And Ron pushed Hermione into a wall in his haste to be by Harry's side.

Harry helped Hermione to her feet and turned to Ron with a look that would have sent the bravest of men running for cover. Ron, however, was oblivious.

"Ron, look what you did! Can't you see you could have hurt me?" Hermione exclaimed indignantly.

"Oh, sorry Herms" was offered in an uncaring voice.

"Ron, I hate that ridiculous name. You know that. So why do you do it?

"Ron!" interrupted Harry in a tight, controlled, voice, "I want you to think very carefully before you answer that."

"Why? It's just Herms, isn't it. Not like she can't take a joke or nothing. She knows I don't mean it."

"Ron. Hermione is a girl. And more than that she is my GIRLFRIEND. Do you know what that means?"

"Yeah, mate, I do." Ron turned to Hermione and started shouting at her. "You just had to go and ruin everything! You put on this 'oh I'm a girl interested in the wonderful boy who lived' and expect everyone to do what you want when all you are is a gold digging scarlet woman! I bet you spread your legs for any man if they're rich enough."

Hearing this and seeing Hermione on the verge of tears Harry did the first thing that came to mind. He pulled back and punched Ron in the nose. He then hugged Hermione and led her to the library to calm down.

"Harry! You shouldn't have hit him like that! You will get in trouble."

"Anyone who messes with you or upsets you gets to deal with me! I won't let that slob hurt you when I am there. You know I won't."

"I know. I just don't want you in trouble for hitting that prat."

"Hermione Jean!" Harry teased "Where does this language come from?"

"My mouth. But someone has been a bad influence on me." Giggled Hermione.

Walking into the common room after an uneventful dinner Hermione heard a voice she could happily live without ever hearing again.

"Hey, Herms! Just 'cos you're giving Potter some doesn't mean you can't share it around you know." Ron said with a leer. "Come here and let me see what the goodies are."

Everyone in the room backed away from the incipient blast zone.

"You giant, self-serving, egotistical, rude, gormless, sexist prat! You think that just because I am Harry's girlfriend I would suddenly want to sleep with anything male! You bastard. You want me to switch to you? Well switch THIS!" pointing at Ron's crotch she quickly performed a switching spell and then stormed up to her dorm. Ron suddenly had a small dead, partially dismembered rat in his trousers.

Percy sighed, it didn't look like Ron would ever learn. He quickly stunned his brother and levitated him to the hospital wing. He wondered if Madam Pomphrey had a cure for stupidity. No-one was going to be happy about this.

Everyone else settled down quietly after an exciting, and amusing, day.

Getting into his bed that night Harry discovered that Ron's pet rat Scabbers had chewed its way into the centre of his pillow. After thinking about the situation for a minute Harry made his decision. It wasn't his pet, he was the one who fed the thing because Ron forgot most of the time, rats piddled on everything, which was disgusting, and why should he put up with it? He sent for Professor McGonagall.

"Professor. I'm sorry to disturb you so late but this rat isn't being taken care of and, if I remember right, shouldn't even be here. I thought that it was only cats, owls and toads allowed. It belongs to Ron but…"

Professor McGonagall interrupted "That is understandable you don't want to take responsibility for Ronald's pet. And yes you are correct. Owls, cats or toads are the only pet choices here. I will just check that it has no diseases and then take it away…that's strange… I have never seen that reading before. Mr Potter please go and fetch its cage. Quickly please."

"Sorry Professor, Ron doesn't keep it in a cage. It tends to roam the dorm."

Quickly transfiguring a cage Professor McGonagall replied "Just put it in here. I will take care of it now. Was there anything else? I would take a shower if I were you. Oh, and you may call a house elf to give you a new pillow. Good night."

"Night Professor."

That night Harry had a very vivid dream. He was on a tropical island where Hermione was playing in the soft waves on the shore wearing nothing but a tiny white bikini with yellow dots. She looked like she was enjoying the best day of her life. Harry sat on the sand to watch her and didn't notice that he had company until they sat down next to him.

Two Dementors sat on either side of him. They didn't cause the usual vivid bad memories to surface.

"Of course not, you silly boy. We take vacations too you know. And, yes we can read minds. Now THIS is a great sight to see. Don't see things this good often. But tell me…have you kissed her yet? No? Why not? All you have to do is pucker up and plant one on her. Geez! It's so simple. I can show you if you like… "

The Dementors leaned toward each other over Harry's head and…

Harry woke up screaming.

At breakfast the next morning Hermione was approached by an irate head of house.

"Miss Granger. I must insist that you tell me where you switched Mr Weasley's genitalia to. Madam Pomphrey cannot fix Mr Weasley without his, ahem, proper equipment." Professor McGonagall asked heatedly.

"Um, I don't think Ron will be getting it back Professor. Err; I switched it with a rat from the Columbia."

"Well, it may be awkward, but Magical Columbia is friendly with Magical Britain. There shouldn't be a major problem. I will contact their ministry and…"

"No. You don't understand. I don't mean the country Columbia. I meant the Space Shuttle!"

Every muggle born or muggle raised student started laughing uproariously at the news. They couldn't wait to go home at christmas and find out if something … unusual… and very small…had been found on the space flight.

Several thousand miles away, orbiting the earth on the NASA space shuttle Columbia, a team of astronaut scientists were puzzling over an unexpected discovery and loss. Where did a small set of male reproductive organs come from? And what happened to the rat they were dissecting? This incident would never be officially recorded and the mystery would never be solved.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

Wow, I can't believe I got this far on characters I don't own. Never have, never will. Darn it! 

The weekend finally arrived.

Ron had spent two days in the infirmary trying to get his 'meat and 2 veg' fixed. Fortunately Madam Pomphrey was able to grow a new set for him.

"How do girls do it? Those seats are cold!" He thought.

Arthur arrived mid-morning and went to see Ron immediately.

"Hello Ron. I came to ask if you have made your choice yet? Or do you want me to make it for you?" Asked Arthur.

"Dad, I thought about it and I want to go home. Aunt Muriel can't be worse than dealing with everyone here! Harry betrayed me with that scarlet woman and Hermione hexed my bits off! And no-one talks to me and they all are prat's anyway. So, when do we leave?" Ron said in a rush.

"Are you sure? This cannot be changed remember. If you leave now you can NEVER come back to Hogwarts."

"I'm sure. Things can't be worse at home. Please Dad!"

"Alright, I will tell the Headmaster. Go and pack your things. I will see you at the entrance in one hour."

As a disappointed Arthur went to inform Albus of Ron's decision Ron was looking for his belongings. He didn't even notice that his rat wasn't there. The dorm was empty and he was looking for anything that caught his fancy.

"Cloak, no name on it (He ripped the name tag off) mine, broken shoes, Harry, new gobstones, mine, torn books, Nev's…"

This continued for a while until the floor was cleared.

"Let's see what's in the trunks. Hmm…oh I like this…and this…why not? I'll take these too!" Ron thought to himself, never noticing he was turning green.

At the end of the hour Ron dragged his trunk to the entrance to wait for his father. The Headmaster arrived with Arthur and both were shocked to see a forest green boy waiting for them.

"Err, Ron? You havn't been eating the twin's candy again have you?" Arthur asked in concern.

"No, why?" asked a confused Ron.

Dumbledore looked on in amusement.

Three boys walked through the hall followed by a large number of students. Seeing Ron standing there green they knew at once who had been setting off the wards on their trunks. They were not happy.

"Ahh, your friends have come to see you off Mr Weasley. How marvellous." Said Dumbledore

"No sir." Corrected Dean. "We were heading up to our dorms to see who was setting off out trunk wards."

"You warded your trunks? Whatever for?" Queried a confused Headmaster.

"Ron was caught red handed trying to steal from us before. We took steps to stop it happening again." Answered Seamus.

"Hmm. That is a serious allegation. What happens when the ward has been tripped?"

"That's easy sir! The thief turns green until they confess to the owner. Then they turn normal." Replied Neville.

"I am sorry but given the accusations and the fact that Ronald is green we must investigate. Ronald, please open your trunk." Ordered Dumbledore, more serious than anyone had seen him.

Ron saw that he had little choice in the matter. Either he did it or his father would do it for him. Sighing, Ron opened the lid and stepped back.

"Hey! That's my dad's cloak!" cried Harry.

"Those are my magazines." Said Dean.

"Ronald! Did you steal these things? Yes or no!" Thundered Arthur, even more furious than the night the letters arrived and started all of this mess.

"Umm…err…I don't know how they got in my trunk…" Ron mumbled.

"Mr Ronald Billius Weasley. I am officially warning you now that this is a criminal matter. You are still a Hogwarts student until you leave the grounds today and still bound by our rules. Unless you confess I will have no choice but to call the Aurors to investigate. Did you steal these items?" said Dumbledore sternly.

"No. I didn't steal nothing." A scared Ron whimpered.

"Very well then. I will go and…Hello Madam Bones. You just saved me a floo call." Said Dumbledore seeing a stern looking witch walk in. "We seem to have an accusation, well several accusations, of theft. The accused has denied stealing any items, however, these three boys have said that anti-theft wards on their trunks have been activated and young Mr Weasley here is showing signs of the security identification spell."

"Headmaster, good day. I am actually here because Professor McGonagall sent for me. I am happy to help out, naturally." Turning to Ron she continued "I am Amelia Bones, Head of the Department of Magical Law Enforcement. You are?"

'In deep dragon dung!' Ron thought. Aloud he said "Ronald Weasley.

"As your father is here I can start asking questions now. Is that all right Arthur?"

Arthur nodded his consent.

"Good. Let's start then. Is this your trunk?"

"Yeah"

"Did you pack it today?"

"Well…yes."

"And you claim that all the items in here are yours?"

"Umm…yes?"

"That doesn't sound like you are sure of yourself. I will ask again… do these items belong to you?" asked Madam Bones, getting sterner.

"I. Err…I…no." stammered Ron, looking at his shoes.

"Very well. The accused has confessed that the items do NOT belong to him. Who do the items belong to?"

"Harry, Dean Seamus and Neville." Muttered Ron quietly.

Turning to the named boys, Madam Bones asked "Do any of you wish to press charges?"

The boys looked uncomfortably at each other and Harry spoke

"Madam, that cloak is the only thing I have that belonged to my parents. Ron knows that and still did this. I want him punished properly. If this was the first time he had done this then I might have been able to say no, but I can't knowing he would take something so precious to me away like this."

The other boys just nodded in agreement.

"As you wish then. Mr Potter, do you know how long your father had that cloak?"

"Madam, I can answer that." Interrupted the Headmaster. "The cloak belonged to Charlus Oberon Potter, who told me that he was given it by his father Oberon Potter. Charlus gave it to his son, James Charlus Potter, who left it in my possession shortly before his death. I returned it to Harry James Potter a few years ago."

"Thank you Professor." Turning to Ron Madam Bones said "Ronald Weasley, you are under arrest for theft and for the theft of an heirloom of a most Ancient and most Noble house. You will be taken to the Ministry of Magic holding cells where you will await your trial. Do you understand?"

"Y…Y…Ye…Yes" Ron stammered out. He was scared out of what little mind he had.

Dumbledore faced Ron and said in a solemn voice "I am sorry but I must do this. Ronald Weasley. You are hereby expelled from Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. You are henceforth banned from seeking education, shelter or assistance from this institution from this moment forth. Please give me your wand."

Shaking, Ron handed over his new wand. He only had had it for a few months.

"As per the bylaws of this school I must ask if this wand will be needed as evidence."

"No, the alleged crimes were perpetrated without the use of a wand" said Madam Bones

"Then I am sorry my boy" and with that Dumbledore snapped the wand in two.

With that Madam Bones called for two aurors to take Ron away.

As Ron was led away Harry turned to Arthur, who had been quiet through the whole ordeal, and offered his apologies for what had happened.

Arthur faced Harry and said "Harry, Ron was the one in the wrong here. NEVER apologise for doing what is right. There is more happening than just the thefts. This probably would have happened no matter what you did. I am proud of you and you are always welcome at the Burrow. Don't forget that."

With that Arthur walked out to follow his wayward son to the ministry.

Madam Bones turned to the Headmaster and asked "Are there any more crimes I need to be informed of or can I go about the business I came here for?"

"I apologise for the inconvenience. Thank you for your help today. Please feel free to go about your business and, if you have time, please join your niece for a meal when you have finished." Replied Dumbledore.

Finally entering Professor McGonagall's office Madam Bones sighed deeply. This had already been a tough trip and didn't look like getting any better if the look on Minerva's face gave any clues.

"Amelia, thank you for coming. My concern is this rat. Until last night it was the pet of Ronald Weasley. Harry Potter brought it to my attention because it had destroyed his pillow and he was unwilling to care for the animal. Harry also, correctly, pointed out the rule on pets. Rat's are not on the approved list. I cast the usual charms on it and came up with some unusual results. I am unsure what this is but it does not register as human. It registers close to an animagus. That is why I sent for you and not the magical creatures division. Could you see what you think?"

"Hmm… I think you're right. This is odd. I will take it with me and see what we can find out. I will be in touch."

With that Madam Bones picked up the rat and left.

At the ministry Madam Bones started barking orders and watched people run. "Get me someone from magical creatures, get the papers for an illegal animagus, se if the Weasley boy has a legal rep and if not get one for him, get me the latest report on Black and for the love of Merlin get me a cup of tea before I get cranky!" Everyone scurried out of her way.

The magical creatures expert arrived. "Well, let's see what you are, Ratty." He said casting multiple charms. The cage shook and the rat began to grow and change.

"Stupify!" Madam Bones said calmly. "I was half expecting that. So, animagus?"

"Animagus" the creature expert confirmed. "Your department not mine."

"Thanks. Could you sent a few aurors in as you go? Thanks again."

Madam Bones was puzzled and she didn't like that feeling. As the aurors arrived she explained the situation and wanted stunners at the slightest twitch. No one would hide as a rat if they didn't have something to hide.

"One,two,three! Oh Merlin's mouldy sock! I know him! That's Peter Pettigrew! But he's meant to be DEAD! Get me some veritaserum. I want it here yesterday!"


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

I own my clothes, my books and my computer. None of them are the rights to Harry Potter. Oh well, back to the fun stuff.

Warning! For me, this is a long chapter. The warning is; don't expect this to happen often. 

At Hogwarts there was a large group of upset students. Not upset that one of their own was taken away, but at the sight of that person having their wand snapped. The older students explained to the younger and muggle born students the significance of that action. The thought of having no magic or being cast from the magical world was unthinkable. It would take time for the wounds to heal.

Harry sat in his dorm with his friends talking about the events of the day.

"Neville? What did Madam Bones mean about the 'Ancient and Noble House'? I thought that the Potter's were just another family and that was that?" asked Harry.

"Sorry Harry. I forgot that you are muggle raised. It means that your family is old and titled. 'Ancient' means that you can trace your family back to before the Norman invasion in 1066 and the 'Noble' means that you have a title to inherit when you come of age. The 'Most' at the start of the title means a high title, like an Earl, or you can trace your family back to before the Romans. There are five families that fit the description. Potter, Longbottom, Bones, Lovegood and Moon. That's the top of society."

"So even if my parents lived I would still be known?" asked Harry, trying to understand.

"Yes. All pureblood children grow up knowing the families equal to them or above them socially. Next are the Ancient houses, then the Noble's, then purebloods, halfbloods and then muggleborns. Below muggleborns are the foreign families. Unless they marry into a higher ranked family they always sit at the bottom." Explained Neville.

"So how did the Malfoy's get so much power?" asked Hermione curiously.

"Ahh, I know this one," laughed Seamus. "They married into the Black family. Paid a fortune and a half for the 'privilege' me gran said. Right lot of tossers they were too! Before that no one wanted anything to do with those 'Frogged albino's' as me gran calls them."

They all laughed at that.

"So if it wasn't for the Black's, the Malfoy's would be no-bodies! That's something to dream about." Laughed Dean.

"But why was it so bad that stealing my dad's cloak got an extra charge? It sounded like it was the more important charge." Harry said a bit confused.

"It was. Stealing from anyone is bad, stealing from an Ancient and Noble house is a higher level of trouble. But stealing something that is an heirloom to an Ancient and Noble house is like stealing a part of that family's history. Anything that has been in your family more than three generations is considered an heirloom. It could even be a dirty pair of knickers! That is why it is so bad. It is like taking the past away from your family." Neville explained.

"Ok. So what happens now? I wish there was a class to explain these things! It would make things so much easier if everyone knew the same!" Grumbled Hermione.

Fred (or was it George?) stuck his head around the door. "I know you probably don't want to see any Weasley's now but…"

"Get in here you twin twits! It was Ron, not you so build a bridge!" Harry said with a smile.

"Err…was that the punishment you wanted us to do? Build a bridge? Where do you wa…" asked George.

"Muggle saying. 'Build a bridge and get over it!'" Harry explained. "It means that it's over and we move past it, ok?"

"OK!" was shouted by the others.

"We wanted to warn you about what will happen. Dad spoke to us in Hogsmeade and told us everything." Fred said seriously.

"The hearing will be on Monday and you will need to tell the courts what happened. Then they might ask you to supply memories or take truth potions. Because you are all minors you will have to have your guardians there to OK it. Harry, you will probably have the headmaster of Professor McGonagall. After that Ron will be questioned and the court will break to make their decision. After that it is time to find out the punishment and then its butter beer and bickies." Said George.

Monday arrived faster than anyone wanted it to. Today they have to put someone they once considered a friend in prison.

Molly Weasley entered the court room uncharacteristically quiet. She was hearing in her head all the things that Minerva McGonagall had said to her the previous week and was forced to confront her own actions.

"Well, Molly, I have a few things I would like to say to you. And since you can't talk back, you can just sit there and listen. Over the years we teachers encounter overbearing, domineering, overprotective or controlling parents. Usually it is only one or two traits that we see. You however fit all the descriptions and possibly more.

"You coddle your children, under the guise of loving them, until they rebel just so that they can grow into adults, as they are supposed to. It has not escaped my attention that your children are leaving home as quickly as possible. William ran to Egypt a week after he graduated and Charles joined the dragon reserve the night after his graduation. If that doesn't tell you anything then I am probably wasting my breath!

"You seem to delight in yelling at your children in a loud and public manner with little or no regards to their feelings. The howlers you send several times a year are already a part of Hogwarts folklore. But they do nothing but embarrass your children and give everyone in the hall a front row seat at the airing of the family's dirty laundry. This gives others ammunition for teasing your children. Most of your children can tune them out by the end of their first year but the stigma of getting a howler remains. And I am warning you now, if any more howlers from you are delivered to this school I, as deputy headmistress, will be taking legal measures against you.

"The children are already at a disadvantage by wearing and using obviously second hand clothes and equipment. I know that because of your financial position that all your children are here on scholarships that provide for NEW items each year, including a new, fully stocked, potions kit and wand care items. For first years that also includes NEW wands. Not ones that have been handed through several generations of the family. I have seen that only one of your children have ever had new wand and that was Ronald after he broke his in the tree incident. And it took until the following summer for you to replace it! A whole school year! The wands your children are using are ill matched and worn out. This makes them dangerous to use, both to them and their classmates. Yet you have shown no concern about that.

"Your attitude towards your children's education is, at best, neglectful and at worst out right abusive! You are setting these children, which you loudly proclaim to love, up for failure. Without these items they are struggling from the moment they set foot on the train.

"I am going to be asking for the scholarship board to investigate your use of the money in this case. If they find that the amount given is insufficient or if the money has been mishandled then they will deal with you personally.

"As a parent, you have had the children for eleven years before they come to school. In that time you are expected to raise them to be honest and mannered people who know what and where society's boundaries are and which lines not to cross. In most cases, for any child, small slips that are done in ignorance or in fun are often ignored. Ronald, however, shows no sign of knowing or caring of any of them. Did you neglect his teaching? Or were you so overwhelmed at finally having a daughter that you simply forgot to teach him at all?

"I must say that I am disgusted that I have been hearing how whenever Arthur tries to teach or discipline the children you countermand what he says and does so that his time and teaching is wasted and disregarded. Arthur has a good head on his shoulders and can teach your children much more than you would think. It is time for you to let him fill his role as a father. Let him teach the boys how to become good men. They all need that guidance, and they have an outstanding role model to learn from. Your daughter has much she could learn from him too. Or would you prefer to see her in a bad relationship because she didn't know what to look for in a man?"

Molly hated to admit, even to herself, that Minerva was right. She had neglected Ron in favour of Ginny. The twins being mischief on two (well, four between them) legs didn't help either. How was she to fix things with Ron facing prison time? Molly didn't want to think that it was already too late.

Once everyone who wanted to be there (and a few who didn't) was seated the doors to the court room closed and locked themselves. They would not open until after the verdict was read.

Several emotional hours later it was time to hear Ron's fate.

Dumbledore read out the sentence with a heave heart. Another child that he could no longer help.

"On this day, October Fourth Nineteen Ninety Three, We the Wizengamot find Ronald Billius Weasley Guilty on all counts. There is a mandatory sentence in this case of ten years in Azkaban. Owing to the nature of the crimes and the age of the guilty party we are recommending that upon his release that his magic be bound, his memory wiped of all but the time of his sentence and be released into the muggle world. Hopefully you will be young enough to make a productive and happy life for yourself. This, of course, is conditional on the prisoner's survival. May Merlin have mercy on you."

With that Ron was led away in manacles. He did not look around or seem to notice when Molly began screaming. He was resigned to his fate.

"Well, I got something none of my brothers have. A prison sentence. That isn't what I was thinking of."

Molly was led out by Arthur, both of them grieving for their son. They lost him totally today and he would never remember them and Azkaban doesn't have family visitation.

The bailiff stood and announced, "The court will be in recess until One PM for lunch. Upon returning we will be dealing with the matter of the Ministry v's Peter Pettigrew."

This drew gasps from those who knew the story of Sirius Black and his murder of twelve muggles and one wizard. There would be a full court room after the word spread.

"Mr Potter," said Professor McGonagall "This man was once a friend of your parents. I think it might be a good idea if you stayed and saw the trial. I don't know the charges but…"

"I want to stay please. If he was a friend of my parents I want to know what is happening. Can the others stay too?" Harry asked politely.

"If that is acceptable to their guardians" she got a round of nods. "Then you have my permission." Finished the Professor.

When the court reconvened there was standing room only in the visitor's gallery. The press were squeezed into their section and there was much jostling and manoeuvring to try and get the best view of the defendant's chair. There was a feeling of quiet excitement in the air.

At the proper time the members of the Wizengamot entered and took their seats.

"Bring in the prisoner"

Peter Pettigrew, a wizard thought dead for over ten years, was led in in chains. He was forced to sit in the defendant's chair that wrapped him in further chains.

Dumbledore, in his role as head of the Wizengamot started the proceedings.

"Mr Pettigrew. Owing to the fact that you have consistently refused to answer any and all questions posed to you by the DMLE you are hereby ordered to answer all questions under veritaserum. Auror, Please administer the potion…let us begin.

"What is your name?"

"Peter Yaris Pettigrew" was said in a monotone.

"Have you ever committed any crimes?"

"Yes"

This caused a stir among the crowd.

"Please list the five most serious crimes."

"I am an unregistered animagus, I know of two other unregistered animagus and have not reported them, I stole food and money from many people, I framed Sirius Black for murdering muggles and I betrayed James and Lilly Potter to my Lord Voldemort."

There were several gasps and muffled screams at the final confession.

"How did you betray the Potters?"

"I was the secret keeper. I told my Lord the secret and led him to the house."

Harry was shaking with anger hearing that. There were too many people to get through to try and leave so Hermione did the only thing she could to calm him down. She hugged Harry and then held his hand tightly. Professor McGonagall saw this and smiled approvingly.

Dumbledore continued the questioning. "Were you aware that your actions could and probably would lead to the deaths of all three Potters?"

"Yes. I wanted all of them dead."

Harry and several witches and wizards jumped to their feet yelling.

"Order! Order! Any more outbursts and I will clear the court! Mr Pettigrew, why did you want the Potter family dead?"

"James always had everything he wanted. Good looks, the family that everyone envied, a 'best friend' that he loved so much that he named Black godfather to his brat rather than ME, money… I wanted that too but couldn't get it. Who wants me if you can have James bloody Potter instead? So I got rid of him." Peter started giggling insanely.

Harry was sickened by what he was hearing but bravely sat listening to the poison coming out of the traitor's mouth.

"How did you frame Sirius Black?"

"I yelled that he betrayed the Potters and cut my finger off and cast a 'bombarda' at the ground. I think I hit a gas pipe or something because it was a big explosion. Much bigger than I expected. I turned into my rat form and ran away. I thought it was funny you all got it wrong for so long."

"How did you live?"

"I found a family of wizards after a few days and one of their brats kept me as a pet."

"Who are the other unregistered animagus that you know of?"

"James Potter was a large stag. Sirius Black is a black dog that looks like a grim."

"I see… lords and ladies of the Wizengamot. Do we need to hear any more? Or should we pass judgment now?"

Most of the judges nodded that they had heard enough.

"Very well. We will deliberate and pass judgment shortly."

With that they stood and left the room. Everyone started talking about what they had just witnessed.

"Harry! Are you alright?" cried a worried Hermione.

"No." Harry said through gritted teeth. "But I just… I needed to hear this through. That scum wanted me dead and I want to see what is going to happen to him. If it's not bad enough I just might use some of this 'fame' of mine to change a few opinions. So, Black is my godfather? I wonder if I have a godmother too?"

"Your mum was my godmother and my mum was, well is, yours. From what my gran told me we were like brothers when we were babies." Neville said softly. "I thought you knew, that's why I didn't say anything. I thought that you didn't want to know me anymore."

"Hey, that makes us 'God Brothers'" Harry laughed. "Brothers for life?" he asked Neville, reaching out his hand.

"Brothers for life!" Neville grinned, gripping Harry's hand tightly.

Harry was swamped by hugs from not only Hermione, but from a tearful Professor McGonagall. The twins and Neville shrugged and made it a group hug that got everyone around them laughing.

When Dumbledore returned so did the solemn feeling that swept through the court room.

"We have made our decision. Peter Pettigrew, you are to be remanded into the care of the department of magical law enforcement and questioned, under truth potion, for all the illegal activities that you may have committed or have any knowledge of. The results will be available to any who wish to read your despicable confession after a period of two years. When your questioning is complete you will be cast through the veil of death. May Merlin have mercy on you.

"Furthermore, owing to Pettigrew's confession, Sirius Black is hereby granted an immediate pardon and compensation will be negotiated with him at his earliest convenience. His animagus description will be broadcast on the wireless and printed in all newspapers. If any member of the public see's Mr Black, either in his human or dog forms, please approach him with care and then tell him the good news. If I remember him from his school days the bearer of the good news may need their ribs repaired at Saint Mungo's hospital from the hug he may give the bearer of such good news. There are no other matters here today and so this court is dismissed."

A gavel was banged and everyone started talking as they left the ministry.

"What…? Three unregistered animagus were running around Hogwarts and I didn't know? They could have been killed! They could have been injured. They…they could have asked me for help." Professor McGonagall said sadly. "It does explain one thing. Harry, one morning in your fathers fifth year James came into breakfast with the most magnificent set of antlers on his head. Sirius Black had dog ears on the top of his head. We all thought that it was a prank gone wrong. They must have not been able to transform back entirely. It was funny to see. I think I still have a picture of them in my office."

"I would love to see it Professor" Harry laughed.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

Still don't own anything...

To those who said I was too harsh on Ron.

This is my work and it was explained why the sentance was so harsh and in an earlier chapter what the conciquenses were if Ron was expeled. If you dont like it then please dont read and then complain. Also, to the reader who said Dumbledore had no right to snap Ron's wand, two words: Rubius Hagrid!

Several weeks had passed quietly. Life continued as it usually would.

Sirius had been found by a man walking his dog the day after the trial. The black dog was acting suspiciously and the man took a chance in calling Sirius by name. The man was later treated by St Mungo's for cracked ribs, a strained back and whiplash caused by Sirius hugging him and spinning the both in circles.

Immediately after taking a much needed shower he went to the ministry to organise his official pardon and compensation. During the compensation negotiations Sirius asked where Harry was and when he could see his godson.

Hearing that Harry had been living with Petunia and Vernon Dursley the air around Sirius turned blue (and nearly black at times) with the profanities he bellowed. Sirius immediately demanded custody of his godson and threatened dire and public prank wars against the ministry if custody was not granted immediately, both magical and muggle. The ink on the papers was not yet dry when they were given to Sirius by a former classmate. (Said classmate was later found sitting in a corner rocking and muttering "Not again, not again" repeatedly.)

After a short stay in hospital to treat any lingering health problems (paid for by the ministry) Sirius arrived at Hogwarts to meet his godson for the first time in twelve years. To say it was a touching reunion would be an understatement. The pair picked up where they had left their relationship last. With Sirius teasing Harry, Harry pranking Padfoot with wandless magic (and Hermione's help) and Padfoot blaming Moony.

They would go on to be a family that many would look up to and try to emulate.

Harry and Hermione continued to date throughout Howarts and married a year after graduating.

All in all, life was good.

One morning Arthur Weasley received an unexpected official owl.

"What's this then? Oh dear,

'Mr A. Weasley.

We are writing to inform you of the transfer of your son Ronald B Weasley (Prisoner No 8674533) from Azkaban Prison to the prison section of Saint Mungo's Hospital. This is owing to your son's excessive and potentially lethal flatulence. To date he has been responsible for the death of four Dementors and the illness of several prisoners in his cell block.

Additionally, there has been an increase in suicide attempts amongst the prisoners in that particular cell block since your son was interred as a prisoner. Unfortunately there were several prisoners who were successful in their attempts, including the infamous Lestange family.

All of the illnesses and suicide attempts coincide with the day Ronald was brought to the prison. The day after Ronald's arrival the first of the Dementors died.

We are hoping that the hospital can find a cure for this problem.

We are asking if this is a family illness or curse and, if so, is there a cure?

Please help. We are getting desperate and the Dementors are threatening to leave and all shifts must use a bubblehead charm and protective goggles just to perform the most basic tasks.

Yours truly,

Alcon Hubei

Head Warden

Azkaban Prison.'"

Arthur read and then re-read the letter.

"They should have read his medical records from school" Arthur thought grimly. "I can't believe they are asking ME for help."

And with that thought he threw the letter away.

A few days later Arthur read the Daily Prophet. Splayed across the front page was the headline "ST MUNGOS HOSPITAL CLOSED!"

"Oh no, don't tell me he…no, I am just being silly!" Arthur thought with a shake of his head and started reading the article. "Noxious fumes, unexplained gas detected, violent illnesses, oh Merlin, Morgana and Mordred! Ron!"

The end.


End file.
